For a while now, I’ve been entertaining some non-annoying ways to earn a bit of change for what I do here on this blog. I’ve concluded that the once-in-a-while ad or a few pieces of sponsored social content is fine, and I hope you don’t mind. But lately I’ve found that I can be bossy, help people find ideas for badass stuff to buy, and perhaps make a little bit of money at the same time. To that end, I’d like to recommend a few things for you on this here page. It’s called foodbitch finds, and you’re looking at it right this very minute.

I’ll tell you what to buy and you’ll like it.

Basically, if you’ve got a food-lover in your life, you might want to visit this page every once in a while to peruse, click around and maybe even make a purchase. Birthdays, anniversaries and holidays call for thoughtful gifts and it’s not just the thought that counts, guys. Make it a good one. Here are some things I love and have bought. I am not being paid to make any of these choices, but if you click one of them and buy it based on my honest recommendation, I will get a lil kickback. That’s some hot disclaimer action right there.

Let’s start with books, shall we?

Sometimes I stop eating for like five minutes. Long enough, perhaps, to read something. I like books about comedy and food. Cookbooks are also sometimes awesome. For the pictures.

Which reminds me: I heart Amazon

Truly, I do. I mentioned this a couple of times on the blog, but I have twins. That’s TWO BABIES, folks. At the same time. Amazon Prime is a mom’s best friend, and a twin mom’s effing soulmate. Sorry if I go all mom blogger on this, but Amazon has saved our asses more than I can count when we run out of diapers, wipes or noise-cancelling headphones. Just kidding about that last one. Kind of. Knowing I can order something and it will be on our doorstep in 48 hours or less, without paying shipping, gives me legit peace of mind.

Click the banner above to sign up for a 30-day trial of Prime. The trial is free, and if you decide to join, $99 gets you free 2-day shipping for a year, allows you to borrow kindle books for free, access to 40,000 movies and TV episodes from Amazon Video, UNLIMITED PHOTO STORAGE, Amazon Smile (my charity of choice is Cafe Momentum), and most of all, Amazon Subscribe and Save. When you auto-order 5 more more items in a month, you get 15% off all of your month’s S&S items. Bam.

I even have a list with all my favorite random Amazon things on it, from beauty to coffee to keto hacks. Check it out here.

Learn to do something fancy in the kitchen. Because cooking is sexy.

Here you go. Learn a new trick in the kitchen, then go crazy applying it to everything. Impress your friends. Get laid. Works every time. Just ask this guy.

Smoke ’em if you got ’em.

Fun fact: I like to smoke my own salmon. You would too, if you know how incredibly easy it was to do so. Buy this and you will be smoking salmon like nobody’s business. In fact, here’s a little bundle of #JewFood goodness, from smoking chips to stovetop smoker, amazing cookbook by the incomparable Amy Kritzer of What Jew Wanna Eat to some finishing salts out of Portland, OR. Wham and also bam. You’re welcome. Now go make yourself some smoked salmon atop a rainbow bagel.

Speaking of #JewFood, #JewThings and Amy Kritzer,

I’m working with to bring you my faves from the bestest site for #JewThings on the whole dang internet.

Here are some badass gifts I’d love to receive,

so it’s quite possible you (or perhaps your ladyfriend?) would love them too. sparkle_and_dineJust in time for the holidays, I discovered this lovely local company called Sparkle and Dine. They do tablescapes. If you don’t know what a tablescape is, that pretty much means you need to head over to their website and place an order. A few weeks ago, they sent me a package containing chargers, a beautiful table runner, fabulous napkins, a gold vase, place cards and teensy vases on which the place cards can be displayed. All of this, plus my own dishes, flowers and glassware, makes for a fool-proof Kate Spade-esque tablescape. Genius!

OH, GiGi! 

GiGi New York Leather Tote Bags (or anything really) from GiGi New York are to-die-for gorgeous. Perfect to store your favorite cookbook, your laptop or just whatever you need to hit the town, day or night. The company also makes beautiful personalized leather journals, iPad covers and more.

Hello, mixer porn!

Mixers and inspiralizers and mini preps OH MY! Here are a few of my favorite things for cooking at home. Now go make yourself a fresh, pesto-topped squash noodle dish or something. With chocolate mousse for dessert.

I love Dallas-ized giftwares.

white and gold-etched city glassware from The Uncommon GreenCheck out this amazing mapped, etched glassware by The UncommonGreen!

I’m a huge fan of getting folks personalized gifts based on a time or place, and these quality pieces that reflect a meaningful place are perfect for a birthday, anniversary or wedding gift. Check out their site:

Give him or her something to display food inside, and maybe he or she will cook for you!

cost plus world market logoHere’s a somewhat guilty pleasure: shopping at World Market. Yes, there are tasty samples. Yes, there’s a ton of wicker. But the serving dishes and other tableware you can find there is so great. So whether they call it Cost Plus, Cost Plus World Market or World Market where you live, go there and get the goods. Trust.

Make your feet happy.

Happy Socks logo

A fun-yet-practical gift for the gentleman in your life is Happy Socks. Because crazy, colorful socks are so hot right now. Show a little character when you lift your trouser leg. Mmmm. That’s right. Mama likey. Oh, and they have socks for ladies and kids too. They even have socks designed by Snoop Dog. No shit! Right now they’re offering FREE SHIPPING. Back To School, Back To Work Sale! Get Free Shipping on All Orders at (Valid 8/18 – 8/24 @ 11:59pm CET. Cannot be combined. Excludes AUS and NL)


Last, but not least, meet Selfie.

It’s not the super-annoying kind of #selfie I wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot {shudder} selfie stick. It’s a nerdy little WordPress widget that lets anybody pay me cash moneys to show my readers a message (kind of like a sponsored tweet). I think it’s kind of a cool concept, so I’ve tossed a few Selfies around the site, like a little advertiser scavenger hunt! Who doesn’t love a little scavenger hunt? Anyway, anyone can use it; if you want to wish someone happy birthday, you can buy a foodbitch Selfie for literally one day. If you own a restaurant, you can buy a foodbitch Selfie for a month to tell everyone about your happy hour specials! If you just want to tell everyone you think I suck? Fuck if I care? Pay my ass and you can tell my loyal readers that for an entire year. Who’s laughing now, punk? Anyway, a foodbitch Selfie looks like this:


Spot one, and you win the opportunity to sponsor yourself. Make it good…